A guide to avoiding offenses and common sense in relation to black women's feminist struggle.
It is very common, unfortunately, to misrepresent the anti-racist feminist struggle, reproduce common sense and even offenses. Because of this situation, I put together a small didactic manual. This is the first part.
“Accept different opinions”
Dear white person, if you are from Palmeiras and think that Corinthians is worse, that's fine, I can accept it. If you prefer cooked meat without carrots, ok But to say that beauty is a matter of opinion, it is not possible. Racism is at the base of the construction of beauty. I got tired of hearing: “Wow, you are a beautiful black woman” (with an air of surprise) or “You are the most beautiful black woman I know”.
Black women, of course, are ugly by nature. Nobody says that a white woman is a "pretty white woman". They just say it's "beautiful". A black woman can only be beautiful among other black women. They like to hierarchize our beauty. And the classic “You give ten to zero in a lot of white people out there”? What a compliment!
“Not liking relationships with black women has nothing to do with racism, nobody commands love”
Love never chooses black women. Funny. According to the IBGE, black women are the least likely to marry and form the majority of single mothers. Academic works reveal the affective loneliness of black women.
If racism has a preponderant role in the construction of beauty standards, it will consequently have in the construction of desire. Look at the magazines. Turn on the TV. What is the “ideal woman”? How many of us were passed over for the simple fact of being black? How to talk about personal taste, when the overwhelming majority reject black women? How can we speak of “individual choice” when these choices do not choose us? Sorry for the pun.
“You see racism in everything”
Guess what... Racism is a structural element of society. There were more than 300 years of slavery and institutional measures to prevent the social mobility of the black population. And you say that now everything is racism. In what historical time was it born? Are you sure you're from this planet?
No one talks about racism because they're hot, or because they don't have anything else to do in their lives. I wouldn't want to harp on the same thing so much, but society doesn't give me any other option. Now, take your spaceship and head back to the planet you came from. For if you had arrived yesterday and taken a quick look around, you would have noticed the latent racism in this society. Finally, I go there to put on my Lancôme. You know, I need to look my best for the next meteor shower.
“You need to create a way to unite women and not separate them”
Society is divided. As Sueli Carneiro teaches us so well, racism creates a gender hierarchy and places black women in a situation of greater social vulnerability. Therefore, it is necessary to name this reality, because no one thinks of a solution to even a pronounced problem. There are several possibilities of being a woman and, precisely because it was universalized based on the white woman, it must be said. This is not about competition, but about historical facts, research data.
You want to destroy a reality by imposing yours as universal and still demand ways to dialogue when there is a vast bibliography on the subject. We don't suffer equally. Gender violence affects all women, but it affects more severely those who combine more than one oppression. If you still insist, complain to Ipea, which developed a great material called “Dossiê das Mulheres Negras”.
“I find women very aggressive and violent when it comes to making claims”
First, define violence. Second, we are here to bring narratives of discomfort, as Audre Lorde says. We are angry and we have a right to be. You would be too if you lived under a violent and inhumane reality. If they laughed and excluded you since childhood for being black. And finally, it is not up to the oppressor to tell the oppressed how he should react to violence.
“I love your color, black women are exotic”
Black women are not rare animals to be considered exotic. We are, in fact, the majority of women in Brazil. To refer to a group in this way is to place oneself as superior. Did you know that for a long time black men and women were exposed in human zoos based on this belief? I recommend reading about the Hottentot Venus, Sarah Baartman, exposed because she is considered “exotic”.
Even after his death, his remains, including private parts, were on display until 2002 at the Museum of Man in Paris. Treat black men and women naturally and not as if they were extraterrestrials, with condescension. Do as they do with the whites, without fanfare or surprise. If you want to be black, I inform you: racism is part of the combo.
_________________________________________
Article published on Portal Géledes.
