Empathy, according to the dictionary, is the process of identification in which a person puts himself in the place of another and tries to understand his behavior. In practice, empathy is sometimes misunderstood and the “identification process” part is lost. Furthermore, it is often confused with proactive sympathy. All this generates situations where people with disabilities are labeled as rude and even ungrateful!
However, people forget that it is not possible to put yourself in someone else's shoes if you do not know the factors that influence your life, especially if you have never experienced such a reality.
People with disabilities are aware of their condition and, as I have mentioned in other texts, they know what their limitations are and what are the best ways to respond to certain situations.
When a person does not have KNOWLEDGE about the reality of another with any limitation, he must always first ask IF and HOW he can help. Often, offering a hand, for example, does not help in practice, because for the person with a disability it can be easier and safer in a way that they discovered on their own, which works well for them, even if it seems strange or not very functional to you.
When you learn how best to help, or how to receive help, you have real knowledge. That's when you fully exercise empathy, putting yourself in the other person's shoes, without making use of assumptions that could be wrong and end up even making the situation worse.
Remember that old phrase “asking does not offend”? Sometimes it does offend, yes, if you don't do it with respect, with sympathy. So, think that it is precisely asking with respect that one learns. And when we learn, we can teach others, generating a more inclusive reality.
Difference exists and is part of human diversity. We need to know so we can help safely and effectively.
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Amanda Lyra - Singer, songwriter, producer and presenter, wheelchair user and creator of the Solyra Project . Follow her on FACEBOOK and INSTAGRAM .
Paloma Santos is an illustrator, wheelchair user and feminist. "In my work as an illustrator I try to represent female diversity". Follow her on INSTAGRAM and like her on FACEBOOK .
